Sunday, April 24, 2011

Easter and Toy's "R" Us

Easter is here! Celebrate the rise of the king of kings! With thousands of eggs! And a bunny that no one has ever seen! Where is the world going if we are so desperate to eat candy we have to come up with excuses about a bunny laying eggs full of candy, and, and pooping jelly beans? This is ridiculous. It's easily one of the stupidest things I've ever heard.

Sheen (Jimmy Neutron) - "No! This is the stupidest thing you ever heard! GABABLAGGALAGGALA!!!"

[Side Note]
The Suggested words (Red Squiggly Line) that come up when I typed that weird screaming thing Sheen does include:

  • LAGGARDNESS
  • EXTRAGALACTIC
  • GALAPAGOS
  • LALLYGAGGING


Back to the topics at hand, and if you didn't know, with the exception of 'Chuck Norris and Pie,' I make the topics up before I start wr... excuse me, typing them. Ok. Toy's "R" Us.

I realized, about a week ago, that the R in Toy's "R" Us is mirrored to look like, a backwards R... And why are there "quotation marks" around it? Its ridiculous. You could confuse the crap out of English "majors" if you just randomly use "them" everywhere. By the way, I know it's us as in a group of people, but it's funnier if you think of it as United States. Why is it funnier? Cause the USA doesn't do squat. I think 99% of all things are made in China, .5% of everything else is made in Taiwan, and everything else is a mix of everywhere else, except the USA! I think the only thing that I've seen that was made by the "USA" was  a McDonald's Double Quarter Pounder. It says so on the tag they put on the "patty."

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Typewriters

My favorite subject. Typewriters. 
  1. They are very heavy. Make grand weapons.
  2. They cure about any unhappy feeling, except for Tarzan Flu.
  3. They sometimes have the ability to fly. Sometimes.
  4. I can't wait for them to come out with the iTypewriter.
  5. Typewriter is the longest word you can spell with only one line of keys on the keyboard.
  6. You just looked.
  7. ...

Typewriters are awful subjects to write blog posts over. Sometimes I just wan't to jump off a typewriter. 
Hehe, never mind, they are amazing. 

I need a box of typewriters so I could say, "Hey! I got a box of typewriters!"

New topic time, uh...
Easter
Easter is a good subject. Aww golly. this is officially the worst post ever. 

New topic, ok.
Giving up

Best thing ever.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Chuck Norris and Pie

A poem for the most amazing human alive.

Chuck Norris, you are taller than a microwave.
You are smaller than the average elephant.
You don't have to shave.
You never say, "I can't"
You always put on clothes.
You never have to eat flies.
You can make antlers grow on does.
You can sow and grow seeds of pies. 
None of these statements are lies.

Right after I wrote this, and read it allowed to my brother, I said, "This is Stupid."

I never really liked pie. I LOVE CAKE. Never liked pie though. Except for the Oreo pie at bakers square, a restaurant that does not exist in Oklahoma. Best pie and only pie I like. 

Thumper, our rabbit, bit through a bunch of chords in my room today, after I found him after school. It was awesome. He made sure to take my phone charger and  bite it into 3 pieces. 

My birthday is coming up. All I wan't for my birthday right now is the best video game known to man. Ty the Tasmanian Tiger 2: Bush Rescue. Classic Game Cube game. Only like 15 bucks new on amazon. I'll probably buy it before the day of May of the thirty first of the hour of I don't care. Probably.

Today is officially the last day I will ever be 15 and 322/365 years old.



Saturday, April 16, 2011

If you have read the about me thing, you may know that I am an animation freak. Love animation. 95% of my favorite movies are animated. Enjoy doing it myself, too. Had an idea not too long ago. Here's the rough idea (can't get the basic animation up because its exported in some weird format).

Pans across a view of black and white hills, black and white trees, black and white sun, everything black and white. Except for one something, maybe a bird, or a tree. Just one. One little object. Zooms into it, and if it's a tree, a leaf will fall off, and if its something else, I don't know, but the leaf will fall and fly a ways, hit the ground, and color will spread from it into the hills, the other trees, the sun, everything. Then I don't know what. Something funny will happen, probably.

Basic idea. It's fairly easy to make too, cant figure out how I'm going to get the color to spread, though.

And the joke of the day (always made up on the spot)!

Q- What did one trash can say to the other?
A- "You smell bad."

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

A Little Poem

I wonder where the world would be
If I didn't have to pee.

I might be off somewhere
Building a secret lair.

Maybe even singing happily
and skipping gleefully

But golly oh gee...
I just have to pee.

I will win.

Basically why I made this to try to beat my dad at getting more followers. he has something like 34. I have 1. I am going to win. And, I think I could make a pretty hilarious blog. Starting tomorrow. I'm tired right now.